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Reflecting on “Cesarean Courage”

A couple months ago, a dear friend of mine linked me to this post, entitled “Cesarean Courage.”  It really resonated me with me for so many reasons.  When I was planning our HBAC attempt (and now planning our V/HBA2C for the future), people would often casually remark on how brave I was to be planning not only a VBAC, but an HBAC.  I never felt particularly brave–I knew the facts, the statistics, the reasons why a VBAC was safest for me and my baby.  Now, having had 2 cesareans and working towards a VBA2C, I must say I do feel like I am courageous.  But not courageous for planning a vaginal birth after having had two cesareans.  It takes a lot of courage, for me, to plan another vaginal birth knowing that I might have another cesarean.  People may not realize it, but when they tell me “You’re so brave” now, I silently agree with them for reasons they probably don’t understand.  And I see courage in every one of my ICAN sisters who are traveling, or have traveled, this same road with me.

What about you?  Have you or do you feel courageous on your journey to VBAC?

5 Comments

  1. Elizabeth Belden Handler says:

    Cesarean moms are some of the bravest, most selfless people on Earth. Who else goes under the knife to have major abdominal surgery for someone they’ve never met?
    We started ICAN for many reasons, but that fact is one of the biggies. Women need to be told this. You all are strong, brave, loving women.

  2. Sarah Oakley says:

    Thank you for sharing. You hit it right on the mark for me. Yes, COURAGE is most definitely the word and for planning a vaginal birth knowing it might be a cesarean. That is exactly the courage I am working on. I have one daughter who was born via emergent cesarean. I hope to have at least one more child and will be planning a VBAC. It isn’t the VBAC or potential homebirth (that is undecided at this point)….it is the knowing, the deep yearning for wishing I didn’t know the reality and the possibility of another cesarean.

  3. Wendy says:

    It absolutely takes courage. I am 37 weeks, and on my way to a completely planned VBAC. It’s been a long road with much adversity. I almost don’t have the courage anymore. And no reason, either. Fear of the unknown is creeping in, and I’m hoping it doesn’t overwhelm me. I’m tired of the majority of society feeling like Im just being selfish and taking too big of a risk, for attempting VBAC.

  4. Catherine Harper says:

    Gosh, I can’t read that post without crying. What she says is so incredibly true. I know that, with my first pregnancy, I planned the perfect natural birth for my son, and despite my very best efforts, it didn’t happen. Preparing for my VBAC, I planned the best birth for my son, whether it was vaginal or by cesarean, and changing my perspective and knowing what I could face helped so much. I did have a CBAC, after a natural labor, and though it was still incredibly hard to enter that OR a second time, it was easier because I had prepared for it, and I felt much more in control the second time. I have nothing but respect for c-section moms, because we make such a sacrifice, on both our hearts and our bodies, for our babies.

  5. Martha says:

    I love this post because I remember feeling the same way! I didn’t feel brave or courageous for planning a vba2c. When I had my hba2c I still didn’t feel brave or courageous simply for birthing at home. I did, however, feel brave for choosing to do something that wasn’t widely accepted or supported. I felt brave because in a system where vbac has to be fought for I stood up for the choice that was best for me and my babies and our situation :) I’m so proud of the mamas who make the choice that is right for them and thier baby even if it means standing firm when those around us aren’t as supportive as they should be.